happy 200 and 15k

Tuesday, May 15, 2018

so today i am hitting two major blogging milestones! this is my 200th post and the day that i hit 15,000 views.

i just want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart! i started this blog in 2015 and i didn't expect much from it. i had no idea what to talk about and quite frankly i didn't even know who i was. i feel like this blog has brought so much growth to my life. thank you so much for following me on this journey!

for those of you who have been here since the first post, you are crazy! but honestly, thank you for seeing something in me, when i couldn't even see myself. you have seen me change my blogging topic several times, you were there when i published take me with you, and most of all you were here when i hit 15,000 page views! thanks for sticking around, i can't wait to see where this blog goes!

for those of you who are more recent, i am just as grateful for you! you see something in me and this blog and that is truly amazing! i hope that you stick around so that you can witness some cool things that i have planned for this blog and for my life. read some old posts if you desire to and stay tuned!

that is all i really have to say! so thank you again! let's see what adventures await us, shall we?

much love, aubs

friend dates

Sunday, May 13, 2018

so you go to college and you meet your best friends, but what about summer? you all have to go back to your hometowns; some of you have internships, some have full-time jobs, others are traveling the world. so what exactly do you do to keep up with your friends?

you could just hang out and watch movies or you could do something much more exciting! like, go on a friend date. i think it's unique and a change of scenery to go somewhere new with your friends.

recently i went on a friend date with grace. we initially planned on going to downtown detroit for lunch, but we ended up just hanging around her city. it was super fun because we both got all dressed up like we were going on an actual date and we just spent the day together.

it's so crucial to stay connected to your college friends throughout the summer. it might only be three months, but it's a great idea to get excited about seeing them every now and then.

so seriously, take some time this week. connect with a friend and schedule a fun date for you two. go get coffee, go to a movie, go out to eat, etc. whatever you do, just remember to give your friend your full attention!

love your friends like they're a special date, they deserve it!

xoxo, Aubs 

active faith

Sunday, May 6, 2018

hello friends! i recently was chatting with my friend, bryce, about actively pursuing God every day. we both thought that it would make a great blog post to start out the summer blogging season. this summer i want to make an effort to blog more often and to pursue God at all times.

when bryce and i were talking, we discussed ways that we pursue God. now, you have all probably been told to read your Bible, pray, go to church, etc. but what about the mundane tasks?
1 Corinthians 10:31 calls us to do everything for the glory of God; "so whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." so what about putting on your makeup or brushing your teeth? what about filling your water bottle or driving to work/school? what if, with every task, we pursued God with all we've got?

now i'm just going to discuss two of the tasks i mentioned above, putting on your makeup and filling a water bottle.

i told bryce that i have begun to sing of His praise while i do my makeup in the morning, just to remind myself who God is. sometimes i will play my favorite worship songs or i will just say a simple mantra like "you are the great I am" or "faith over fear." just doing this has transformed how i feel in the morning, it wakes me up, reduces my anxiety, and generally makes me happier.

and bryce told me that he has been thinking about the cisterns in our lives and how God is the only cistern we should be filling and the only cistern we should be using to fill ourselves. now if you don't know what a cistern is, check out Jeremiah 2:13. bryce explained it best when he said, "we dig our own cisterns, our own broken cisterns, never enough to make me happy, can never fill me up like the spring of living water that is the cistern of God." now bryce told me that he thinks of this every time he fills his water bottle and prays that he fills his cistern with God.

isn't it just extravagant that God is present in everything you do? isn't is truly amazing that God wants to be present in everything you do? that all He wants is to know you?

i hope that you find a small task in your life or take one of the ones i mentioned and use it to glorify God.

xoxo, Aubs 

i can only imagine

Saturday, March 31, 2018

hi friends!

i just got back from seeing i can only imagine with my mom and i'm pretty sure you need to go see it too because holy moly was it amazing! but really there were a couple things that stuck with me, 1. priscilla shirer was in the movie, which for some reason reminded me of christine caine's talk at passion, probably because i needed to hear the truth from her talk again. 2. bart's manager said to him, "what are you running from?" and then told bart to "embrace it" 3. no matter how much your (my) life is falling apart, Jesus is never ever ever ever (a million times ever) going to abandon you (me).

so yeah, let me expand on these all a little bit more!

one. christine caine's main point during her passion talk was "who told you?" and lately i've been really down on myself and feeling super unworthy and just unlovable. you guys probably think i have my life altogether, especially since i wrote a blog post on the topic of being unlovable, but honestly, i don't have it all together. i write these posts for me so that when i am feeling this way, i can look back and read the truth. anyways back to christine's talk. so during this movie, i saw priscilla and i instantly thought of christine and instantly thought, "who told me i was unworthy and unlovable?" Jesus sure didn't say that. i mean Jesus thought i was worthy and lovable, enough so that He died for me. so why do i let my depression and anxiety spew lies in my life? why do i let past events tell me who i am? because man, i am forgiven, i am worthy, i am loved, i am lovable, and i am pretty freaking awesome. so that being said, i need to remember that it only matters what God says about me, not what anyone else, myself included, says about me.

two. "what are you running from?" a lot. "embrace it" how? how should i do that God?
i am going to journal about this tonight, see what God says to me and for once listen to Him. i encourage you to do the very same thing. tell Him what you're running from and ask Him how you can embrace it.

three. last week was a rough week. i was extremely panicky and anxious, i just wanted to curl up in a ball and never leave my bed. i'm not even going to lie, i think i cried every single day of the week because of how overwhelmed i was. but hey, even when i was crying, i was talking to God. i was thanking God every single day that i was alive, that i was feeling emotions, that because of Him i still felt joyful. so you know, even when my life feels like it's falling apart, and i swear it has fallen apart a lot before, Jesus is so freaking cool and will never leave me. and even when He's silent, He's still there.

so yeah man, go see i can only imagine! maybe God will use it to reach out to you in unthinkable ways! and happy easter! Jesus is alive. and He is alive every single day!

xoxo, aubs

spring thoughts

Saturday, March 24, 2018

hello beautiful humans!

it's officially spring! which means that the time changed about a week ago, the sun is out longer, it's getting above 32 degrees most days, seasonal depression is diminishing, and finals are right around the corner.

since it's a new season, i thought i'd give you some thoughts of mine!

01. kombucha is almost as good as water. i've been drinking kombucha almost every day and i absolutely love it! as of late, i am drinking the kevita pineapple peach, like it's going out of style. friends! go to the store and get yourself a kombucha so we can reap the benefits together!

02. leave the past in the past. i keep looking back at my old poetry from my book (from when i was 17) and i get so discouraged because i wrote some of the best work when i was 17 and now i'm 20 and struggling. but ladies and gentlemen, we need to stop looking at our past work, past relationships, past lives; we live in the present and good things will come from this time too.

03. sometimes God put people in your life for one reason; that they need someone to be praying for them. i feel like this happened to me very recently, it's hard to distinguish a person's purpose in your life or even your purpose in theirs. But if God tells you to pray for them, you do it out of obedience, even if it's the last thing you want to do.

04. having gratitude can really change your way of living. recently, i started writing at least five things i am thankful for each day; this has reminded me that there are always things to be thankful for, even when my life feels like it's falling apart. so take a second today, take out that journal, and write five things you're thankful for.

05. eyebrows are annoying and i'm about to grow mine into a unibrow so i can look like frida kahlo. my mom says i could be frida's twin if i grew out my unibrow and mustache, so i say let's do this! i am so very sick of paying to get my eyebrows waxed every two weeks, so why not? this was my one random and out there thought for you, but really all my thoughts are random.

so friends! there are some random spring thoughts for you! i need to take some outdoorsy photo since it's nice out and bring you some aesthetically pleasing posts! 

butterfly effect

Wednesday, March 7, 2018

would you really change the past if you had the option? your future might change along with the present. is it worth it? would you do it? 

do you ever wish you could go back in time and change something you did or said? i know i've thought about that before, like "hey God if you could just give me one more chance not to do that thing or say those words, things would be so much better." but really, if you could change things, should you? most definitely not. have you ever heard of the butterfly effect? not the song, but like the theory? well, i'll tell you about it. so the butterfly effect is the theory that if you went back in time and changed one little thing, then really everything would spiral out of control and everything at this very moment would be different.

i'll give you a real life example here. okay so let's go back into time when aubrey (me) was looking at colleges. i toured grand valley, cornerstone, hope, and calvin. i was 99.99% sure i was going to go to cornerstone and become a youth pastor. that was my goal, but obviously God had bigger, better plans for me and i ended up at grand valley. but let's pretend for a second that i went to cornerstone. i wouldn't have met so many people that i call my best friends, i wouldn't have found an amazing church that i now call home, i wouldn't have met the love of my life (kidding, still haven't met him yet. maybe i would have if i didn't go to gvsu(woah, butterfly effect)), and i honest to God probably wouldn't be writing a blog post about the butterfly effect.

isn't this such a wild thing to think about?

so i guess all that being said, never regret any decisions you make in life. chances are, if you were to change a small decision you made in the past, the present and the future would look inevitably different, maybe even worse.

so ladies and gentlemen, go live your life with this new piece of knowledge and stop living with regrets, you can't change the past and if you could, you wouldn't want to.

xoxo, aubs 

inner workings of my brain

Monday, February 19, 2018

welcome to my brain. my brain is a collection of many weird thoughts, anxieties, motivators, etc. but today, i'm just going to share a couple weird thoughts i've had recently and just elaborate on them. so let's begin, shall we?

okay, time is literally only a concept, but we let it dictate so much of our lives. what time we will wake up, what time we have class, what time we eat, what time we sleep, what time we go out on dates, what time we hang out with friends, etc. time dictates every aspect of our lives, but time is just a concept created by humans. time isn't even a real thing, like yes God made day and night, but he didn't specifically say "the sun will set at blah blah blah time" or "everyone will eat at this time." time is just a restraint that mankind created to make our lives easier to live, but i seem to find that time sometimes makes my life harder. so maybe we just need to take some time and ponder on how much not having time is holding us back.

now for my next thought, i have a question for you all. are you living how you want to live or are you living how society wants you to live? looking at my own life, i seem to find that a lot of the time i'm living how society wants me to live. society wants me to go to college, society wants me to drive a nice car, society wants me to find a husband, society wants me to have children. i mean i also want to go to college and get married and have children. but, if society didn't want me to do those things, would i feel the pressure to do them? probably not. it's weird how much society influences us or holds us back. society says i am a millennial, therefore society already declared that i am not a hard worker, that i won't have a successful love life, that i'll fail over and over again. but that's not even true, because i don't follow society's rules, i follow God's rules. this thought kind of reminds me of christine caine's talk from passion. she questioned us all, "who told you?" who told you, you needed to go to college? who told you, that you needed to find a spouse right now? who told you, that you'll never be successful? God never said these things, therefore they can't be true.

i wake up at 5 am everyday, even though my alarm is set for 7 am. why do i wake up at the same time everyday? maybe it's because i'm not spending enough time with God and He's trying to tell me something. i know that's what it has been in the past, so maybe He's trying to reach me again. maybe it's just my anxiety waking me up and freaking me out, it's also been that before. maybe it's because i have a poet's brain and can't keep my thoughts at bay, even when i'm sleeping. i've written some of my best lines, while being half asleep. it really could be a variety of things.

i'm seriously just trying to get you all to think about some things, that i'm sure you've questioned before.

so here's another one. how do we actually know how were feeling, if we have a word for every emotion? do we actually know what emotions are or are they just words? do we actually know what happiness is or sadness? do we know what hurt feels like? hurt is just a word, not a feeling. if you feel like your heart is being ripped into pieces, do you think hurt justifies that feeling? if you can't get out of bed or stop the tears from flowing, are you really just sad? emotions are just words that we gave meaning to, it's actually so weird to me.

okay, here's another thought for you all. why is halsey sooooo relatable? i'm just listening to her music and it's all just so relatable. like girl my life is falling apart too, but i'm still loving life. remember when i met halsey and cried? same. she's just such an inspiring force, don't @ me.

i was going to end this post and mentioned i was crazy, so now i have another random thought about craziness. so ya'll probably think i'm crazy, which i am. we are all crazy, some more than others. you just have to decide how crazy you want to be and then one day you'll find someone who likes your crazy and you like theirs. wait, so we're basically searching for someone who will compliment our craziness! isn't that just crazy?

i am done scaring you with my thoughts, hope i got you thinking about some of these things. tweet me about your crazy thoughts, i'm curious!

xoxo, aubs